The law of the playground

YOU LOOKING AT ME?: Yanis Varoufakis

OK, I know this is childish, but I reckon Greek Finance Minister Yanis Varoufakis could duff up any of his counterparts in the rest of Europe.

The Belgian one and the Dutch one and the German one AND especially George Osborne, the British Chancellor of the Exchequer. Mr Varoufakis would give them a couple of slaps and they'd be off and running.

All right, I know I'm being silly. I know Greece will not settle its problems in Europe by having its finance minister giving his opposite numbers a Chinese burn and sticking their heads down the toilet (although I wouldn't argue too much if he did that to that tosser George Osborne).

TOSSER: George Osborne

In fact, Mr Varoufakis comes across as a charming and bright individual, who genuinely wants to resolve Greece's economic woes without upsetting the European applecart. Can it be done? Well, we have to hope so.

George Osborne, a man who has a face you'd never tire of slapping, warned a few days ago that the standoff between Greece and the Eurozone was "fast becoming the biggest threat to the global economy". George, George, if I've told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate.

If the British Chancellor is correct, then the global economy must be in a pretty parlous state and I can't help feeling the finger of blame ought to be pointing at something else other than the admittedly wonky financial set-up in Greece. How about we get the banks and all that toxic debt they created to bow their heads in shame?

Anyway, what do I know? My theory of economics allies with that of Mr Micawber in Dickens' David Copperfield. His Micawer Principle runs thus: "Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen pounds nineteen and six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pounds nought and six, result misery."Seems eminently sensible to me, I wonder if George Osborne has read it?

As for music to go with this post, I'd like to respectfully dedicate Money's Too Tight by the Valentine Brothers to Yanis Varoufakis. Let's hope that one day soon money is not "too tight".

* Picture of George Osborne from HM Treasury and used under Open Government Licence.