Sings can only get better

There's a lot going on in May, a General Election in Britain, my birthday, and...oh yes...the 60th Eurovision Song Contest.

Eurovision is one of those things that's easy to make fun of, but difficult to stop watching once you start as you try to work out if what you are looking at is for real.

This year, the contest is being held in Vienna from May 19 to 23, and 40 countries will slug it out with strange songs and dubious voting practices.

Most of the countries taking part are members of the European Broadcasting Union, although this year Australia is a guest entrant. Yes, that Australia, the one that's as far from Europe as it's possible to get.

The reason that I'm writing about Eurovision now is that participating countries are going through the process of choosing their entries and I happened to notice that Greece had made its choice.

This year Greece will be represented by Maria-Eleni Kyriakou, who is singing One Last Breath. I can't help feeling that's a slightly unfortunate title for a song, particularly from Greece bearing in mind the countries economic woes. Having said that, I should point out another of the contenders was a song called Crash and Burn.

Maria-Eleni Kyriakou will sing One Last Breath.

Maria-Eleni will be familiar to Greek TV viewers - not me, I don't have a telly. She also took part in The Voice of Greece.  How she will do is anyone's guess. I wish her well, but maybe not too well. Does Greece really need the burden of having to stage next year's Eurovision if it wins this year's? This year will be the tenth anniversary of the last time Greece won the contest so maybe it is time for another taste of success.

In other Eurovision news, Germany - funny how often they crop up on this blog - chose its song and singer who promptly stood down and said the second-placed song should vie for honours in Vienna. Andreas Kummert, a slightly tubby gent with a beard and glasses, something which I would have thought would guarantee success, said he wasn't ready to do vocal battle and called on second-placed Ann Sophie to do the honours. Her song is called Black Smoke.

And the dear old UK has made its choice. The cynic in me wonders what the point is because other countries in Europe seem to have made it their mission to find ever more amusing ways to humiliate the brave souls representing the UK as a form of punishment for Britain's part in the Iraq war. I concede that could be me being paranoid, but as I don't really care who wins Eurovision it doesn't matter..

Anyway, this year the UK has pinned its hopes on musical duo Electro Velvet - Alex Larke and Bianca Nicholas - who will be singing Still in Love with You.

Conceivably, I could have put music from all three countries on this posting, but I thought that might be a bit much so I've opted for the UK entry. Apparently, it comes from a genre known as electro swing....yeah, me neither. See what you think and post a comment with your thoughts.

* Picture of Maria-Eleni Kyriakou by Mad TV from the Eurovision Song Contest website.

Time to ease up on the kicking

So today is the day the Greek government submits its package of reforms to international creditors who are meant to go "That's all right then, here, have another four months to start getting yourself back on your feet".

Or will they? Who knows? Certainly not me. As I write this what does seem clear is that as far as the government here is concerned bending over backwards is only ever going to be half the battle. In fact, as far as certain other European governments are concerned bending over backwards will be regarded as being rather limp-wristed. Disappearing up your own backside would be their preferred option.

Now, please note, I haven't specified any government as being particularly disposed towards making Greece jump through ever more fiery hoops. However, can I just say at this point that I am currently reading a history of the hyper-inflation which afflicted Germany in the 1920s.

Have you got anything smaller?: A 1923 5 million
mark note from Germany.

It is chilling reading. In the wake of the First World War, Germany's economy tanked and to exacerbate the situation increasing demands were made of Germany for reparations. Every time the Germans looked as if they might just have a moment to catch their breath, fresh demands were made for them to cough up money or other benefits to another European nation. Let's not mince words, generally it was the French who made these demands.

I'm only part way through the book so I don't know how it ends. Oh, all right, I do know how it ends. It ends with things becoming intolerable in Germany, the rise of the Nazi party and the start of the Second World War. Happy now?

Let's be frank here. I'm not sure we can say there are direct parallels between Germany in the 1920s and Greece now. Their particular situations arose in different ways, but if you kick someone when they are down and you keep on kicking them and then for good measure give them another kicking, it is entirely likely they won't be able to get up again. And that can't be good.

Funnily enough, I couldn't find any music about hyper-inflation, so I've settled for the Flying Lizards' version of Money. Many of you will be familiar with Barrett Strong's original version and also one by the Beatles, but maybe the dispassionate tone of the demands for money in the Flying Lizards' version fits in with the posting. See what you think.

* Banknote picture by Boeing720 (Own work) [CC BY-SA 3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

When we want your opinion we'll give it to you

"Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair." That is one of my favourite one-liners from American comic George Burns to which these days would have to be added "or commenting on websites and writing blogs". To the latter indictment I plead guilty as charged.

However, if you are in Greece you might also wish to add "or being German" because as Greece heads towards parliamentary elections on January 25 there has been no shortage of advice coming from Germany on the potential impact of how Greeks might choose to vote.

What seems to give everyone a fit of the vapours is the possibility that the left-wing Syriza party would gain control. Party leader Alexis Tsipras, who I have seen described by the BBC as a "firebrand"...oo-er, has pledged to "condemn the failed memoranda of austerity", which some feel will lead to Greece defaulting on its debts and then leaving the Euro - the dreaded "Grexit".

No fan of austerity: Syriza leader Alexis Tsipras.
Picture used under Creative Commons licence.

German politicians and media organisations have all been quick to suggest to Greece that it's time to shut up, pay up and keep on paying up and that the best way to go about this would be to elect politicians of much the same political hue as we already have.

One very understandable reason there is so much interest in Germany in what goes on in Greece is that German bank exposure to Greek debt comes in at a whopping 23.5 billion Euros. That would give anyone cause to think, but does it give them the right to tell/suggest/politely hint to Greeks how they should run their country? I suppose in the global economy in which money swoops and swishes around the world, the powerful and rich feel that, yes, they can tell the poor and ailing how they should mend their ways.

Until recently the prospect of Grexit, such an ugly word, has been viewed with dismay, but now many leading German politicians, not least Chancellor Angela Merkel, have said that Greece leaving the Euro would be manageable and the prospect of "contagion" spreading to other troubled economies, namely Portugal and Ireland, was reduced because those countries are considered to be "rehabilitated". So it's off the naughty step for the Portuguese and the Irish and a case of "go your own way" for Greece...maybe.

There has been talk of the use of fear in this current Greek election campaign, much of it along the lines of "You think things have been bad, well, vote in Syriza and you'll be squealing to have the old guard back in power". Opinion polls place Syriza in a comfortable lead and it's plain to see that waving a big stick around in the face of Greek voters is having little effect. Unemployment is around 25 per cent and many Greeks have taken pay cuts while at the same time being faced with tax increases. I suspect that quite a lot of Greek people doubt that anything could be worse than what they are going through now.

Blogger or not, I wouldn't pretend to know what Greece ought to do for the best. Like the joke about the lost motorist who stops in the countryside to ask a yokel for directions and is told "You don't want to start from here" Greece could do with being somewhere completely different before embarking on its journey to economic and political stability. Distrust of politicians of all kinds is rife in this country which seems to have really sapped hope among voters. And it would be an optimistic person who claimed that all Greek taxpayers were ready to do their bit and pay every last cent that they owe.

Be that as it may, I am a great believer in allowing people to cock things up for themselves. So the country which gave us the words politics and democracy, not to mention drama and chaos, should be allowed to make its own choices. For the time being, Mrs Merkel and her colleagues will have to resume their seats and wait to see how this latest moment in Greek history pans out.

* What do you think? See if the Greeks can muddle through or make them toe the line? There could be a drink in it for you if you come up with a startlingly brilliant idea, but you'll have to come  here to collect it, he added hastily.

All that quasi-serious stuff above could do with a bit of light relief so how about this from Fleetwood Mac, which I was inspired to choose from a line in the posting.

You only sing when you're winning

Some months ago in Greece there was consternation at the news that the country could not afford to take part in this year's Eurovision Song Contest and so would not be competing.

This announcement prompted both joy and despair, depending, no doubt, on your view of the contest which has been running for more than half a century. Many felt that by not taking part Greece was displaying commendable fiscal restraint and in any case who gives a monkey's about such a musical dog's breakfast.

I can only presume there were others who may well have felt that if for no other reason than national pride, the country should be represented at this year's contest which takes place in Malmo on three days next week culminating in the final on Saturday, May 18. I further presume that these people are now delighted that somehow it was decided that after all the money could be found for Greece to do Eurovision battle.

Maybe this was not so surprising when you consider that within the last few years Greece was talked into buying two slightly soiled submarines from, now, who was it?...oh yes, Germany, the country that is always telling Greece to tighten its pursestrings. Perhaps that is a digression and I admit I'm not entirely certain how Eurovision entries are funded, but submarines and song contests are a long way down my shopping list.

And so it is that Greece will be represented by the group Koza Mostra together with the popular rebetiko singer Agathon Iakovidis to perform the song Alcohol Is Free. Here they are in a special Eurovision picture:

The song Alcohol Is Free is a comment on the tough times Greece is going through. Strictly speaking, the song title lies, alcohol is not free here although I can confirm it's a lot cheaper than in the UK. Anyway, the song is a pretty frenetic crash, bang, wallop sort of a job by Koza Mostra who are described as practitioners of "Balkan ska". I've only listened to it once and it's the sort of thing I imagine I'd jig around to if I'd had a couple of drinks, free or not.

You can make your own mind up by watching the video. Nifty kilts, aren't they?

So there you have it, a rather nicely bonkers entry for a completely bonkers competition. As someone who doesn't even have a television I won't be watching what happens next week in Malmo, but I wish Koza Mostra well, in fact, I wish good luck to all contestants. Let's face it, at least while countries are singing at each other we can reasonably hope they're not gearing up for invasion.